2 jokes

Two jokes for the price of none.

First, the one my mother sent me:

There were two blonde guys working for the city. One would dig a hole, the other would follow behind him and fill the hole in.

They worked furiously all day without rest, one guy digging a hole, the other guy filling it in again. An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing. So he asked the hole digger, "I appreciate the effort you are putting into your work, but what's the story? You dig a hole and your partner follows behind and fills it up again."

The hole digger wiped his brow and sighed, "Well, normally we are a three-man team, but the guy who plants the trees is sick today."

Then the one I sent my mother:

Guy walks into a New York bar on November 13th and orders 3 shots of Irish whiskey. "Line'm up one next to the other!" (Said in an Irish brogue.)

Bartender serves the 3 shot glasses. Guy drinks them down, 1, 2, 3, pays and leaves.

Next year, same day on the calendar, same guy comes in, orders the same thing, 3 shots of Irish whiskey. Same bartender serves them. Guy drinks them 1, 2, 3, pays and leaves.

Next year, same day on the calendar, same guy comes in, orders the same thing. Same bartender says, "This is the third year in a row you've come in on the 13th and ordered 3 shots of Irish whiskey. What gives?"

"Well, sir. You see, three and a half years ago, I left Ireland to come to these fine shores. My two brothers -- we're triplets, so we are -- they stayed behind. We all three of us promised that each year, on our birthday, we'd drink a round of whiskey ... "together" so to speak, and each think of the others."

Bartender says, "That's great! Tell you what, this year the round's on me." Serves up 3 shots, the guy drinks them down, leaves a nice tip on the bar on his way out.

Next year, November 13th, guy comes into the bar and orders 2 shots of Irish whiskey. Bartender goes pale. "Please don't tell me one of your brothers has passed!"

"Ach, no! They're both fine. But you see I myself have given up the drink!"